Poet Heather Dickson shares her piece AMBER with us. We’ll be publishing Heather’s work regualry, so check in after Christmas for the next installment.
AMBER (Bipolar)
Like a pendulum my mood swings
From one extreme to the other
These swings can last for months at a time
I feel all the high moments, are captured in amber
But, so are all the bad and at the lowest point I feel sad
Alone, hopeless, helpless, I can lose sleep
And not eat, I feel like, I’ve no energy
No interest in daily life, I feel empty
Cold, guilt and despair, I can’t concentrate
I get irritable, I can be pessimistic
I doubt myself sometimes and I wake up early
Delusional and suicidal but at the high point
The mania as they call it, I’m happy,
I’m full of energy, I can talk quite quickly
I feel like I have more value, I have great ideas
I’m motivated, I can be a bit distracted
I can still be irritated easily and I don’t feel
Like sleeping because I have all these ideas
So, I don’t eat, but I can still experience delusions
I can often spend loads of money, without realizing
And I make decisions, that are out of character
I’m on medication now, to help ease the effects
But maybe another course can be taken?
Maybe therapy
to help me recognize the triggers
The pendulum keeps on swinging
The amber keeps on dripping, creating memories
And I believe, it will get easier in time
